TERM 'BLACK HOLES'

PROVES RACISM UNIVERSAL

- RADIO PUNDIT

A UK social commentator claims he is the only non-racist thing in the whole universe.

St Darcus of Howe, speaking on BBC radio said: "Marcus Garvey, Martin Luther King, Malcolm X and Bob Marley were clearly all racist for even acknowledging the white man (and woman) existed.

"Joan Rivers is very very racist for even daring to hint I might be wrong. The studio assistant on this programme clearly showed their bias by asking if I would like a white coffee. I do not even drink coffee of colour, as most of the agricultural workers producing it are poor black people, and most of the land owners and profit makers are white. (He has a point here - Editor.)

"The script on the presenter's desk is made of white paper - that tells us all we need to know. I, on the other hand, am not a racist, and never have been. I know this is true because voices from Africa have told me so.

"The people who came to take me away were wearing white coats, not black coats. That is clearly also telling us something important etc etc."