THOUGHT MY TOAST
TASTED FUNNY!

This shrivelled green and black object atop my toaster may not look much now, but it was until recently a fully paid up member of the gecko family.

The most disturbing thing about this tableau is I found the ex-gecko INSIDE the toaster. I noticed it last night while giving the appliance a routine clean out of crumbs etc to prevent the cockroaches from having a party inside it.

Yesterday morning I remember thinking my toast had a slightly musty taste, but I thought perhaps there had been a speck of mould on the crust and just carried on chewing.

Now I realise I must have been eating very small amounts of barbecued gecko.

The poor creature's legs and tail were all nestling in the bottom of the toaster, like little matches all burnt down to the stem.

Geckos are normally welcome in the house, because they eat the mosquitoes without the need for chemical warfare.

They do however have a number of suicidal habits, including a tendency to hide inside the grooved edges of sliding doors.

I've learned to check the doors before closing them, but until last night was not in the routine of checking the toaster before turning it on.

The second most disturbing thing is that whatever 'toaster gecko' was chasing before its untimely death also appeared to be in the bottom of the machine as a round, hard bit of carbon that was clearly NOT breadcrumbs.