Wednesday, December 28, 2005

NUNBUN ON THE RUN










.............Mother Teresa..............................Nun Bun........

A deformed pastry world famous because of its supposed resemblance to Mother Teresa of Calcutta, has been stolen from the Tennessee cafe where it was baked.

The cinnamon 'NunBun' was reported missing after a break in at the Bongo Java coffee shop in Nashville on Christmas Day.

It had been on display at the premises since 1996 when staff supposedly noticed the similarity as it emerged from the oven.

Mother Teresa herself had a not completely beatific smile when told about the story. She instructed her lawyer to request shop owner Bob Bernstein to stop calling it 'The Mother Teresa Cinnamon Bun'.

When he came up with an alternative - 'The Immaculate Confection' - she was also less than wholly amused.

She wrote to Mr Bernstein appealing to his better nature: "I do know that you have not done anything out of ill will and so trust and understand that you will respect my wish......God bless you."

Though a week before she died in August 1997, she approved the name NunBun.

Mr Bernstein says the loss of the bun is "like a death in the family" but admitted he had received hate mail about it in the past.

He fears it could have been stolen by someone who regards it as sacrilege.

A humourless religious conservative living in the southern US?

That should narrow the suspect list down a bit.



HAPPY HOLIDAYS
MOUSEKETEERS!



Left: Lenin
Below: Disney













Tuesday, December 20, 2005

STARS COME OUT
AGAINST CHINA'S
CAT FUR TRADE

Monday, December 19, 2005

SHARON ILL
AFTER STROKE

HOW NOT TO GET AHEAD
IN ADVERTISING
I'm really really hoping that's a pair of chapped finger tips at the top of this ad poster and not what I think it is.

WTO DELEGATES
FACE ORDEAL
TRAPPED IN WAN CHAI

Sunday, December 18, 2005

KOREAN FARMERS
IN FAREWELL GIG

ADVANCE AUSTRALIA FAIR
(HAIRED)

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

HUMBLE PIE

Either the long arm of the PRC secret police has reached me or I have a software conflict but it seems I may owe the Blogger people an apology.

My dashboard buttons have gone haywire, making it impossible to post pictures or do anything other than a 1980's style Sinclair Spectrum post.

I have asked the Men in Blog for help, so if anyone is still checking in, please bear with me.

Saturday, December 10, 2005

NUN OF US BELIEVE IT

One of two men accused over the murder of a US-born nun in Brazil has said he shot her in self-defence, contradicting earlier statements he made to police.

Rayfran Sales said he thought Dorothy Stang was pulling a gun from her bag, when she instead reached for a Bible.

Sales and another man went on trial on Friday for allegedly killing the nun on the orders of ranchers with whom she was quarrelling over Amazonian land.

Sister Dorothy had fought for peasant farmers' right to own land in the area.

The 73-year-old activist's body was found on a dirt track in a remote part of Para state earlier this year.

Friday, December 09, 2005

WHAT THE BLOG'S GOING ON?

Why have our friends at Google suddenly decided to downgrade the publishing tools available to us on Blogger?

I can't justify left or right, centre, align or change typeface size any more, or set the timing of posts so that items can be written then held for a future date like a real life publication.

In short, I'm being treated like a moron who doesn't deserve to be able to make choices.

I suppose it was only a matter of time before the supposedly benign Google turned into the Microsoft monster it purported to be standing up against.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

CAR RAGE

Almost a third of British drivers have admitted to damaging their own vehicle in fits of road rage, reports Sky News.

Some drivers have snapped off the indicator stick, while one driver got so frustrated she smashed a car window with her handbag, according to new research.

Of 3,000 people surveyed, 12% said they have resorted to kicking their vehicle, while 2% have even copied TV character Basil Fawlty by hitting their car after it had broken down.

But some remain unashamed of their actions, a third of those who had given their vehicle a whack said they felt better afterwards.

As many as 80% of motorists said they felt aggressive behind the wheel at some point.

The main reasons cited for car rage were the behaviour of other drivers, followed by traffic jams and busy roads.

Dixon Motors, which carried out the survey, said the problem of owners damaging their vehicles was increasing.

Its Chief Executive John Haines warned: "Getting stressed and aggressive not only has a detrimental effect on your driving, it also has the potential to cause accidents."

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

NUMBER CRUNCHING

You'd think with all the technology the modern state uses to monitor its citizens, that someone could come up with a more reliable way of estimating crowd numbers.

The organisers of Sunday's pro-democracy march in Hong Kong claimed 250,000 people took part, while an actuary lecturer from Hong Kong University put the numbers as low as 60,000 to 80,000.

The police seemed to hedge their bets by opting for 120,000.

Even allowing for propaganda from different sources inflating or deflating the numbers, in any other walk of life, such sketchy number crunching would result in bankruptcy or instant dismissal.

Perhaps in future everyone going on a pro-democracy march should be required to have their thumb print scanned by electronic turnstiles at Victoria Park, thus ensuring a fair and accurate tally.

I can't see any problem with that, can you?

Monday, December 05, 2005

ALPHABET SOUP

An Italian friend spotted the following exciting items on a Hong Kong menu at the weekend.

Chicken Fixings and Veg
-
Fried Binary Clam Noodles
-
Diversified Late Noodles
-
Fried Meet and Noodles with Wok

I think someone's been a bit too eager with the English-Cantonese dictionary, but you can see where they're coming from.

'Chicken Fixings' could be 'feet' or 'legs' (like the fixings on the bottom of a cabinet or table.
'Fried Binary' noodles could be 'twice-fried' noodles in a clam sauce.
'Diversified' noodles are almost certainly mixed noodles, though whether 'Diversified Late Noodles' are mixed noodles that arrive cold, I couldn't say.
'Fried Meet' is pretty straightforward, though they may have to cook the noodles a long time before the wok gets soft enough to eat as well.

INTERESTING FACTS

The Chinese government charges a leasing fee of US$1 million per year to foreign zoos wishing to display one of its giant pandas.

Apparently any pandas born in captivity in foreign zoos are exempted from the charge, but as giant panda mothers seem to have a distressing habit of abandoning or smothering their newborn, this is sadly quite a rare event.

What happens if the foreign zoo doesn't keep up payments on the animal? Do the Chinese send in repo men to get it back?

I would imagine panda repossession would be a fairly specialised job. You would need quite a large SUV, a bale of straw, fresh bamboo (easy to find in Asia but more of a challenge in Frankfurt or Warsaw), bolt cutters, a digital jamming system for the security cameras and alarm, some planks of wood to bridge the safety pit, panda costumes (to put the animal at its ease) some ketamine and a large sling - oh and a large crate marked "Diplomatic Bag".

U.S. DENIES CIA HAS
SECRET PRISONS
IN EUROPE

Sunday, December 04, 2005

FACE
TRANSPLANT
- FIRST
PICTURE

BRAZIL ACTS
TO SAVE
AMAZON TRIBES

Saturday, December 03, 2005

BAY CITY ROLLER
DRINK DRIVE
CHARGE

BUSH CALLED
FOR JURY
SERVICE

Friday, December 02, 2005

A LOSE LOSE
SITUATION

I'm not a supporter of capital punishment.

I feel no pleasure or righteous satisfaction that Nguyen Tuong Van has been put to death by the state in Singapore.

But amid all the obvious emotion that this case has raised, I'd like to mention a few points I think may be relevant.

1. Did he know the terrible risk he was running - just from his personal viewpoint - let alone the viewpoint of the people whose lives might have been damaged by the "26,000 doses" of heroin the Singapore authorities said his package contained?

It's perfectly possible the Singapore authorities exaggerated the amount of "hits" that Nguyen's parcel could provide, but the grim fact remains that anyone caught with more than 15 grammes of heroin in Singapore faces a mandatory death sentence. A 30 second search on the internet reveals that chilling statistic.

Did he realise just what he was getting himself into? Perhaps not. At 22 (his age when caught in 2002) we all think we're going to live for ever, and that the world owes us a living.

But if he didn't take the trouble to spend 30 seconds of those 22 years inquiring about the personal risks, it's hard to argue against the idea he was the author of his own misfortune.

2. Should a sovereign state have the right to impose its will and its laws on the citizens of another state, even when the other state doesn't much like them?

If that sovereign state is chaotic and applies its rules haphazardly and capriciously, then probably no.
If that state is hard but consistent - ie shows no favouritism to one suspect over another and conducts a trial process according to international standards re presentation of evidence etc then probably yes.

3. So what's the problem with Singapore?

No one seems to bat an eyelid when China executes drug smugglers, because no outsiders expect very much from China in the way of human rights.

But because Singapore LOOKS like a first world country, with shiny shopping malls and polite, educated, citizens, we tend to assume its value systems will be the same as ours.

The trouble is, because Singapore's not a democracy, we don't really know what the beliefs of its citizens are. We only know what the Prime Minister and his People's Action Party (which has run the country for 40 years since independence) SAY their beliefs and values are.

There are reports that death penalty opponents inside the country were denied all access to the mainstream media in the run-up to Nguyen's execution.

And Amnesty International says the city state rarely gives information even about the number of people it executes, let alone their crimes.

4. What about the fact Singapore abolished juries in 1969 and uses only a single judge to try capital offence cases?

It matters, but people going to or passing through Singapore should know the rules and the risks, just as they should also know that possession of alcohol in Saudi Arabia (another prominent non-democracy) is punishable by flogging. It's never stopped the west buying Saudi oil. Don't put yourself in harm's way then complain afterwards when things go wrong that you've been visiting an uncivilised country, runs this argument.

5. What about the fact Amnesty says a disproportionate number of the estimated 400 people hanged in Singapore since 1991 are migrant workers from poor neighbouring countries?

It's deeply troubling. If Nguyen had held a Vietnamese passport rather than an Australian one, we may never even have heard about his crime, let alone his death. Does this mean the Singapore courts are fatally biased against non-Singapore citizens? Possibly.

6. Does this mean rich, powerful countries have the right to lecture and bully other countries just because one of their citizens gets themselves in deep trouble there?

Only if they're prepared to do the same every time a Filipino or Indonesian faces a walk to the gallows.

7. Is it possible western countries operate double standards when it comes to human rights?

If a resident of Singapore planted a bomb in one of our cities, wouldn't we call for the toughest possible punishment for them? It may be that to a Singaporean's mind, heroin is as dangerous as a bomb going off - perhaps more so in the long term, as addiction seems to create other social problems such as theft to fund the habit.

That's the problem with Singapore not being a democracy - we can't be sure what its people think.

8. Did the Australian Prime Minister John Howard and his government do all in their power to get the death sentence commuted to life imprisonment?

A difficult one. Politicians in democracies naturally tend to respond to public opinion - if only to save their own jobs.

Public opinion in Australia appears to have been divided on this case, and it's difficult to avoid the conclusion that Nguyen's ethnicity (ie that he was of Vietnamese descent) might have had something to do with that.

If it had been pretty Michelle Leslie (the Australian model who recently served three months in an Indonesian jail for ecstasy possession) going to the gallows at dawn today, how much more fuss would there have been in Australia and around the world?

But then Michelle, bless her, was with Anindra Bakrie, son of Indonesia's economics minister, at the time of her arrest. And she knew how to play the game with the media, dressing up in a modest Islamic headscarf during her court appearances, even though she'd spent a good deal of her career modelling lingerie.

Singapore's court system doesn't allow TV cameras access. There's too much risk of emotional scenes being broadcast round the world.

Nguyen was carrying heroin, not a drug usually associated with the children of nice middle class Australians on holiday in Bali.

Howard and his advisers probably sensed the mixed signals in the public mood, and made a fairly cold and brutal calculation along the following lines:

Q. If we really press the Singaporeans will they back down?
A. Probably not.

Q. What do we have to gain by pressing the point anyway?
A. Not much, but it will play well with public opinion in Australia and around the world.

Q. Is public opinion at home strongly enough against Ngyuen being hanged that I risk losing my job over it?
A. No.

Q. What do we, Australia, have to lose by pressing the point and failing?
A. Loss of face internationally (especially with Australia's Asian neighbours), plus damage to business and goodwill with Singapore, an important trading partner.

Politics is brutal, and Nguyen just didn't have enough going for him. He was facing the justice system of a country where there's virtually no public scrutiny of decision-making and where the leaders don't worry too much about public opinion - at home or abroad.

Nguyen wasn't enough of a victim (who's going truly to love a heroin smuggler, apart from his mother?) he wasn't white enough and crucially and perhaps fatally, his plight was never going to cost John Howard his job.

FAKE PANDA CUB
CONSIGNMENT
SEIZED IN SHENZHEN

BARE-FACED CHEEK

The festive tradition of what repairmen call “rear-end copying” — office staff jumping on photocopiers to record their nether regions for, ahem, posterity — raises callouts over Christmas by a quarter, says Canon, the copier maker.

To help to cope with the extra load it has increased the thickness of the glass on its machines by a millimetre.

A survey of 600 technicians showed that a third of Christmas work was on broken glass or paper jams of embarrassing images, reports The Times , in London.

Thursday, December 01, 2005

GAY MARRIAGE
TO BE LEGALISED IN
SOUTH AFRICA


PRIMERY SKOOL
REEDING
SET FOUR SHEIKUP

PRETTY POLLY
LIKES
LADY PARROTS
SHOCK

WRONG UK
OLYMPIC GIRLS
STRIP FOR
CHARITY
CALENDAR

 

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